eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
