think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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