Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
