hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize