It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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