You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
