I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
