He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
