i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
