white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Randomize
