Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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