I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
