why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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