It's Friday. Sex?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
They took my balls.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
