Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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