He had one of those small greek statue penises
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
