So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
ugly people sure do ruin things
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I take back everything I said about communal showers
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Lo siento on account of my penis...
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
