Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
