i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
