i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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