Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
