i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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