walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
