I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
