Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Randomize
