Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I wish i was in the wii world.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
