Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
