You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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