If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
