He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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