Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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