if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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