I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
