Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
