I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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