you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
