And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
third nipple confirmed
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
