Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Acid is not a monday night drug
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
