Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I just blew my weed a kiss
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
