I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
