Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
