My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
