Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
