How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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