Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
