i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
