dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
