You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
