But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
