So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
